A Blast From The Past - Translation Failures

Classic Email Autoresponse
Translation Error
The English bit reads as it does. The Welsh bit underneath reads "I am not in the office at the moment. Send any work to be translated."
Also in the news ...

The Bladder Sign
Welsh bit reads (very) roughly "Bladder inflammation upset."

St Joseph's shared faith (former RC) School, Wrexham, Signage
It is meant to read "Staff Entrance." The Welsh bit is gibberish. The closest translation, at a guess, is "Hypnotised with a stick."
And finally ...

Pedestrians, look right.
Welsh pedestrians, look left -
that's where the traffic's coming from! XD
Something to wake you up with a laugh. Good morning.
Let's get to work.
In an ironic twist of alphabetical order, the mood setting for "amused" comes between "aggravated" and "angry." Took me three tries to get the right mood just now.